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Saturday, September 09, 2006

So this morning murky (the stray I had taken in) Got up was wide awake ate and what not she crawled back into bed with me purred and laid curled up against me chest loving and purrin. I told her it was time to get up since we were just chillin and needed to get to fest and what not, she didn't move didn't scream didn't do anything, I thought she was dead and started to panic, I put her nose in the milk hopin she'd drink and she did and everytime i tried to put her on her feet she'd fall over and she'd let her head roll back onto me she didn't want to move anymore. I started crying and freakin out got on clothes and brought her to the vet and they took xrays gave her fluid and put her under the heatin pad... she was fine over the course of 4 hrs she just got worse. I couldn't help but cry and shake I couldn't see me new baby die, I started to panic and just couldn't take it finally after all we had done she started crying out, different this time and sounded like she was in pain. Brodie looked at me and told me she was sorry there was no way she would get better and if was me choice if we should put her down. She screamed again and i started bawlin, i told her if she was in pain yes do it I coulnd't watch this little kitten go through pain like this. She was put down little after 11 and was taken back home were me dad drove home as fast as he could and helped me bury her, the little fiery eyed girl is now in the back yard next to a rasberry tree where I will never forget her, even though i have no pictures, those who met her knew the fire in her heart and eyes and how much she loved me and how happy she was, she couldnt of had a better mom. As for now I can't go to fest I can't dress like a cat and seem to be happy after losin this little life. So now I'm here sittin at me laptop not able to eat, keep crying and can't take this i want another little thing to fill the void. Murky will be dearly missed, everyone at the office said how sorry they were for it, but look on the bright side the little girl didn't freeze on the side of the road or die in the cold but died with a loving person by her side and something to think of as everything went away...I gave her the best 3 days of her life they said and spoiled her little ass and hell i knew i did and still would if i had her, but the goddess knew it was her time and took her from me, in the end it was best she died instead of suffering. Thank you all for helping me through this hard time, this is the first animal i've had to call the shots on about should it be put down. If you need me I have me cell or else i'll be layin here hopin for her return, that little black thing will always be with me never forgotten. RIP Murky ill never forget you, i love u.

emily the strange
7:42 PM